Recently we read the hadith of Umm Zar’ from the Shamail of Imam at-Tirmidhi at the weekly halaqah that I attend regularly.
Hadith Umm Zar’ is a lengthy story about 11 wives sharing details about their husbands in rhymes told by Saidatuna Aishah to Prophet Muhammad.
A few lessons that we can derive, not from the story, but from the attitude of the Prophet in dealing with his wives are:
1. The hadith is collected by Imam at-Tirmidhi in the chapter concerning about the Prophet’s conversations at night.
2. All the hadith in that chapter are conversations the Prophet had with his wives. It shows us the importance of husbands spending time talking to their wives.
3. Night time should, as much as possible, be guarded as family time. As husbands, when we come home from work, give our attention to the family.
4. Unfortunately, often times, we spend time with colleagues at work, and friends after work.
5. Husbands should pay attention to what the wives are sharing. Prophet Muhammad not only listened to the long story, which trust me if you read the hadith, most man will not find it interesting, but he gave his wife his full attention that he was able to summarise the story at the end.
May Allah guide us to following the sunnah and akhlaq of our Prophet.