Casey Grisez

November 10, 2022

Sticky Notes Lesson #8 - Florida Man

I signed up for a month-long, email-based writing course from Cole Schafer of Sticky Notes, Honey Copy, and Chasing Hemingway fame.

He sends a lesson and prompt every day. I have 10 minutes to read and consider the prompt, 40 minutes to write, and 10 minutes to edit before posting publicly.

I’m posting here to not drown my Casey's Notes content. On to day 8...

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If you Google "Florida Man [date]," some ridiculous headlines about Florida Men will pop up. Today's writing prompt is to search "Florida Man [my birthday]" and write a fictional story about the Florida Man in the headline that most catches my attention.

My headline? "Florida Man In Easter Bunny Brawl Is A Fugitive & Talks About His Furry Fist Fight"

Here goes...

Jacksonville was in the midst of a spring heat wave. Rick woke up to the sun streaming through the open window, his mouth dry from last night's Bud Heavies and Marlboros. He looked at the off-balance ceiling fan and decided some grease and coffee would clear the cobwebs.

It's 50/50 whether the stove would light, but he was able to heat up the cast iron pan coated in old grease and food bits. That means it's "seasoned," right?

The sizzle of the bacon and the smell from the old Mr. Coffee already made him feel a little better.

After breakfast and a nap, Rick took the bunny costume out of the closet. He bought it on a whim on Prime Day last year, thinking it would make a hilarious Halloween costume.

There were still some of Lucy's chocolate handprints on the costume from Easter a few weeks prior. Lucy adores Uncle Rick. And Rick didn't even know he liked kids until she was around. Her giggles when he showed up to Easter dinner wearing the bunny suit was the highlight of his year.

Despite a checkered past, Rick's buddy got him a job as a hospital porter. Problem is, the buddy who got him the job knows about the bunny suit and works in the marketing department. The hospital now has a mental health marketing campaign called Some-Bunny Loves You.

Rick got through his four-hour shift at the folding table in the hospital lobby, dutifully handing out a few pamphlets touting the hospital's mental health services.

And he needed a beer. Desperately.

In case a beer turned into more beers, he left his car in the employee parking lot and walked over to Johnnie's. He heard an escalating argument as he walked towards the bar. Both voices slurring and getting louder with every retort.

Rick kept walking and tried to ignore it. He just wanted his first swig of beer. He walked past them, hands in the bunny suit's pockets, keeping his eyes down on the ground. Lucy's handprints were still around his knees. Just her height.

As he passed by, the argument turned physical and the girl ended up on the ground behind Rick.

What if that was Lucy on the ground?

Rick slowed his walk and turned around a little, "Hey buddy, let's knock it off. She's not worth it, right?"

"Nice costume, asshole. And who you callin' buddy?" the guy slurred as his friends stumbled out of Johnnie's door...