Dean Clough

December 17, 2021

Portico Darwin: Color Me Tired of Color

Happy Friday.  In what could be my single most useless newsletter ever (and that's definitely saying something), today I take the time to note a troubling trend.  The trend is that every commercial now seems to feature someone wearing a shirt or shoes that match the color of the sponsor's logo.

I will start with the completely over-exposed Lily, from AT&T.


Next, that woman that's in every single Toyota ad.


And, the super-talented Verizon shill Kate McKinnon.


The worst violators?  Big pharma - or aren't you paying attention to the opioid-induced constipation and plaque psoriasis ads?   Watch and you'll notice that seemingly <every> main character in <every> drug commercial is wearing a shirt or something that is the same color as that in the product's logo.  You'll see.

(Not-so-fun-fact:  Is there a worse example of American corruption than Big Pharma being able to market prescription drugs directly to consumers?  Think about it a second and you'll likely agree.)

I knew our celluloid hero Hunter Deuce would have something to add to my list of the best holiday movies.  I just didn't know it would be this thoughtlessly hurtful to so very many. 

"You really need to add The Ref to your Christmas movie list. Denis Leary plays a jewel thief who takes a Connecticut couple (Kevin Spacey and Judy Davis) hostage while on the run during Christmas.  Hilarity ensues, as Spacey and Davis hate each other and while it's a comedy, the hostility and self-reflection over their failing marriage gets very real.  It's the perfect vehicle for Leary's acerbic delivery, and it's got a great supporting cast of Christine Baranski, Glynis Johns (everyone's nightmare mother-in-law), and J.K. Simmons.


Also, I may get pilloried for this, but Pottersville always seemed like a helluva lot more fun than Bedford Falls."

May get pilloried?  I can't decide which is worse:  his promoting a Kevin Spacey movie, or debasing this most special of holidays by glorifying the vice of Pottersville?  Take that filth somewhere else, son.  

Not to be outdone, film historian Arthur added more to our holiday watch list.

"I would definitely add 'The Bishop's Wife' to the ATF list.   (And) while I normally don't like musicals, 'Holiday Inn' is up there due to Fred Astaire's incredible dance routines, like this one:  Fred Astaire 'Say It With Firecrackers'"

Thank you to any one that is reading this newsletter.

So easy and so fun, and boy, did they have some great songs.  Here is Chicago and "IX", A.K.A. "Chicago's Greatest Hits".  And it's true:  they're not as snide as Steely Dan.


And an extra special bonus, ICYMI and as a diversion from the MOR musings of Chicago:  Amazon is streaming live, for free, Metallica's 40th Anniversary shows this Friday and Sunday nights, taking place here in SF at The Chase Center.  What says Christmas like a bunch of spoiled and overly-pampered multi-millionaires howling from a billion $ arena in San Francisco? 

I think I know why they're offering this for free online.  Their shrinks all suggested they do it to assuage the guilt of the lowest cost face-value tickets to attend in person either night being well over FIVE HUNDRED dollars.  I just looked and a nice seat (but not insane) was $1,250.  For a fucking rock concert.  A Season of Sharing, indeed. 

For context on the egregious pricing, here is my ticket to see The Rolling Stones in 1981 - easily the biggest concert event of that year, and certainly the equivalent for the time to Metallica's elaborate staging and sound of today.  The price difference ($16 vs. $500) is not explained by the big differences in the venue size  - you can derive here that the ticket prices were the same, given the big diff in the various gross receipts.  It is also not inflation:  $16 in 1981 is approximately $50 today.  Hard to attribute it to anything other than greed, no?  Even the massive Metallica guy and Man Cave newcomer Gunther Strobel might agree . . .


About Dean Clough

Plans To Enjoy Life.