Michael Weiner

February 17, 2025

Building relationships with people isn't rocket science

Building meaningful relationships with people is difficult. Effectively managing people on a team is even more difficult. You can't manage people if you don't have a relationship with them. How do you build meaningful relationships with people? 

Every person is different, so what might work for one person might not work for another. No matter the person, building a successful relationship boils down to three simple principles: consistency, honesty, and transparency.

Be consistent in what you share with a person. Don't waver. Most importantly, back up your words with actions. If you say one thing but do something else, how can a person expect you to deliver on your word in the future?

Be honest in your intentions. Honesty isn't always easy. Sometimes it means having difficult, candid conversations. Sometimes it means you disagree with a person. Fundamentally, honesty in your words will help to build a foundation of trust.

Be transparent in your thought process. Share the whole picture. Don't hide or obfuscate information. The whole picture often looks a little different when you look beyond just your perspective.

Be patient. The three principles above take time, and fundamentally they are all related. You can't be transparent if you aren't honest. If you aren't consistent in your behavior, you aren't honest with your intentions.

These statements should not be controversial. These are all principles of a healthy, sustainable relationship. Don't be fooled into thinking otherwise.

About Michael Weiner

Hey, visitor! I'm Michael, a software engineer based in Minnesota, USA. I am an IBMer working on IBM Cloud Kubernetes Service. Feel free to poke around some of my work at michaelweiner.org. Below are some of my personal thoughts on business and my experiences in the computer science industry. Thanks for reading!