Pacific Place Mall (Olive Way entrance), Seattle, 2021.
Just when I take a break because things are "too much" and I need some time to process everything, more happens....
Just when I take a break because things are "too much" and I need some time to process everything, more happens....
But I'm alive, and my children successfully and safely returned to in-person school on the first. And now I'm giving myself time to process things.
Over my break, I intended to plan everything out — be ready to roll as soon as the school year started. But things definitely didn't work out that way.
Even being in a foot cast / boot-thing for several weeks with tendinitis right now where I'm down and I can't really do much else, I still can’t seem to get my brain to focus.
I've questioned whether I really want this or not. If I really wanted this, I'd be able to just do it, right?
But, thanks to lots of therapy and even similar experiences from the Autistic and ADHD communities on Reddit, I can step away from that negative thought long enough to treat myself with compassion.
We're all going through so much right now. Add in extra complications — illness or health issues, death(s) of loved ones, job losses or job changes, familial struggles, et cetera — this is possibly the most difficult time in most of our lives.
If we can't treat ourselves with a little compassion right now, who will?
And if you're in a similar position where the hits just keep on coming, I hope you're doing something for yourself, or getting some outside help or comfort.
Although I've always been fiercely independent to a fault, I am so grateful to my friends, my spouse, my children, my therapist, and even my doctors who have patiently listened and advised where able or needed.
I'm also grateful to myself for finding a way to speak up about my needs, even when I felt the most vulnerable or overstimulated, and grateful to myself for choosing such good people to surround myself with.
There's been so much good and so much struggle recently. At this moment, I'm just grateful to be alive, to know what's been plaguing me for so long, and that I am fortunate to have amazing people who love and support me.
I’m grateful to you, too. Thank you for sticking around with me through thick and thin.
My best,
My best,
Sara
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And here are 5 more things this week:
- I just finished reading People We Meet On Vacation by Emily Henry. Although her content and writing style is a little “YA” for my taste, it was the most appealing (to me) selection of a previous Book of the Month’s subscription option (no affiliation).
- This is my second year with Book of the Month (BOTM), and although I cancelled my subscription of future automatic withdrawals (I’ll come back once I’ve whittled my bookshelf down 30~ish books or so), I do recommend them for readers who like a curated selection of the latest and some pre-release hardcover books at a discount. The fiction genres range from Contemporary to Thrillers, Horror, Romance, Young Adult, and more, with occasional short story collections and non-fiction reads.
- I’ve not read as much lately — which is interesting since I also haven’t written much either — but I definitely enjoyed the simple escapism of The Paradise Series by Elin Hilderbrand: (1) Winter in Paradise, (2) What Happens in Paradise, (3) Troubles in Paradise. These kept me reading when I otherwise felt like not doing anything at all….
- Well, this is how I embarked on my serious writing journey the first time, and how I intend to reignite my flame this time, but T Kira Madden made the case Against Catharsis: Writing is Not Therapy on Lit Hub. (To be clear, I do see a therapist weekly, but processing thoughts and interactions and future actions are best done on paper for me before I am able to coherently and cohesively “speak life into them.” But, writing isn’t “my therapy.”)
- “Reading gives us someplace to go when we have to stay where we are.” —Mason Cooley