I go about my Sundays in a pretty casual way. We wake up late. Most of the time, my youngest kid is the one who breaks into our sleepy world by saying that she has had enough of waiting. Then we usually cook crêpes together. After that we eat them while enjoying some animated movies. Once we are done and the movie is over, we go on about the day and spend a few hours cleaning the entire house. Cozy, calm. That doesn’t sound like a lot of fun, right? Some would call it boring. But I believe there is an immense value in taking care of the basic things in your life, such as cooking and cleaning, and sharing this time with the people you live with, people you care about. Because it is so easy to take it away from you.

Today was no different at all. The movie was Wall-E. And we had a jar of Nutella gone by the time final titles went on. That was a happy morning. But somewhere in the back of my mind I was thinking about this reality gap between “business as usual” and “shit hits the fan” kind of a day. You can hardly see that in events involving a lot of people because it just feels unreal. I mean, there are multiple wars out there. We are all well aware of that. So, while I had my 3rd crêpe someone probably got killed by a bullet. That’s terrible, but by trying to keep that horror in your head during family breakfast you most likely just go insane. I think a much easier way of keeping track of this little reality gap is thinking about people who just yesterday had their normal, - maybe even slightly luxurious - life similar to yours and then got into some out of the blue “WTF is going on” kind of a trouble which hits the news hard in the morning when you wake up for your cup of a  coffee.

Well, today Pavel Durov, founder of Telegram, got arrested and put into prison for “failing to take action against the harmful use of Telegram”. The whole thing looks like Franz Kafka and George Orwell were responsible for writing press releases for French authorities that day. What strikes me the most is that I don't see anyone around being shocked. Yes, there is a reaction here and there. Some celebrities already said the right words. Even mighty Elon Musk did a tweet about Pavel along with other stuff he posted today. But it feels almost like we were waiting for it. As if we all knew that we are headed in this direction. 

If asked about it, people tend to just turn their head away while trying to come up with some kind of an explanation of what that could possibly mean. Generally speaking, nobody cares. There is definitely something underneath it, right? He was probably profiting somehow from all the drugs sold over Telegram or whatever. Or that is just politics. Government agencies came for him because Telegram refused to reasonably collaborate with them on important matters, such as terrorism and money laundry. That's only logical. He knew that was a dangerous game. Of course, that is the way it ends. That’s the real world, baby, wake up! 

Yeah. Well, you know, I have seen this movie before. 

At first only the most outstanding people who are obviously too loud and too straightforward are getting hurt. Outliers. Almost outlaws. Adventurers. Romantics. Politicians. You just shouldn’t be throwing shit to the government authorities that openly on such a scale, should you? Some nice manners wouldn’t hurt. Simple. Nothing to worry about. Things will work out.

Time goes by, and you start seeing how limits are spreading and the circle of acceptable things is becoming more and more narrow. Well, you just have to stay out of politics, man! It is a dirty game. Live your simple life. Mind your own business. Start improving the world from working on yourself, man! You shouldn’t be saying some specific stuff publicly and that’s it. Is that hard? Why bother? Are you running a social network or a chat app with 1B users? No? There are known “double solid lines” one shouldn’t cross, you know. That’s obvious. And those who cross such lines have their reasons for that and they know the rules of the game they are playing and they must expect the consequences. But “regular” people shouldn’t get involved to avoid being hurt. Nobody is interested in you specifically. You are a little and not important at all ant, so keep it that way and everything will be alright. Why would you have your own thoughts about the matter? What do you even know about all of that? They are just using you. Stay out of it. Nothing else is asked from you. Common wisdom will serve you well.

Next morning you wake up and it is not enough anymore to not do certain things, to stay away, to not act. Now you have to start doing something to keep yourself safe and sound. Do not argue. Do not resist. Say something. Do something. Dress something. Demonstrate something. Tell your kids to do the same. You don’t have to agree or believe. Just pretend. Who cares?  And show some respect, man. Why would you hurt yourself for something so little and abstract? What's freedom? There never was any freedom. Otherwise it is all on you, man. You have been warned and you made your choices.

I know, you think you would never let it slip. That’s not real. That’s too much. But you can feel this little worm of compliance fed on your fear growing up in your chest, can’t you? You know you’re afraid to say certain things in certain situations. You know you re-read your last post very carefully and decided to stick to a business instead of speaking your mind. For a long time you've not said publicly what you really think. You get used to it. It is normal. That is what smart educated people do, aren't they? They behave. You know that somewhere deep inside you work hard to push yourself into certain beliefs, into ignorance, into the cozy calmness of everyday life. You know that's something is off balance. But what can you do about it? Nothing.

I know you feel that, because I feel that too. And I hate the feeling because I know it too well. Because I felt it before. In the same moment, that previous experience, as unpleasant as it is, makes it easier for me to see it through and push that shit back out of my mind. I know myself. But what about you? Are you ready?