💀💀💀💀 + cute lil permanent retainer

teeth had been showing up a lot for me in recent months (see: the 7th entry in this recent post) so obviously I was psychosomatically setting myself up for tooth troubles. And guess what, I had to get all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed this week (!!!). It was my first time experiencing complete general anesthesia, and I was also very scared for the post-surgery recovery given the extreme pain and discomfort my wisdom teeth have given me over the years. When I told my friend Ijeoma I was going to finally do something about my wisdoms, she noted for me how much pain these teeth have put me in throughout the years 😵‍💫🥺

my last meal pre-surgery: an enormous, cheesy, delicious al pastor burrito from La Placita in Middletown, CT

no picture of the burrito because it was eaten immediately

it seemed like I was going to have to have a liquid diet in the week following the surgery. so I went whole hog on the yummiest meal I could get my hands on in the middle of Connecticut. 

my grocery haul of semi-liquid/soft food:

at this point, I was very worried about the anesthesia and also wanted to make sure everything would go as smoothly as possible after the surgery.
I overdramatically ended a conversation with my brother saying, "if I don't wake up from the surgery, just know that I love you".
He called me back a couple hours later and accidentally called my anesthesia a euthanasia: "how are you feeling about your euthanasia tomorrow", thus validating every fear I had (!!!). goodbye, cruel world...

the surgery happened and went swimmingly. day of, I spent the day in bed in a daze and I remembered a yummy banana smoothie recipe that my friend Jenny and I used to make with her mom when we were kids. I texted her for the recipe, and it turned out to be very complex:

my expectation vs. reality of the banana smoothie recipe parallels nicely with the expectation vs. reality of my post-surgery recovery. I ended up experiencing barely any pain and discomfort in the days following, and now appear to be well in the clear. I took the opportunity anyway to take things easy: I spent the time reading, going nuts on Duolingo, eating more applesauce than would be normally acceptable, working minimally

what I ended up being able to eat within 3 days of surgery (a decadent father's day breakfast fry):

a meal of everything absolutely doused in bacon fat

Left: got home and immediately drooled blood down my front; 
Right: a pic I don't remember taking in the recovery area. Happened to capture a sign that says "the taking of pictures and video recordings is strictly prohibited in this office. absolutely no cell phone use in the recovery area". oops

P.S. regarding the title of this post. my faithful copywriter mrcoles (of mrcoles.com fame) reminded me that we use the word “fewer” when it comes to countable nouns like teeth rather than the word “less”. So I’m declaring my usage of the word “less” a stylistic choice. Congrats on getting to the end of the post and to this postscript, I hope it paid off!!