Relationships are for spiritual growth.
My Partner mirrors my trauma back at me. I don't see them; I see my projections. Lucky me!
Now, to heal, I face my trauma on the path to genuine relating.

In romantic relationships, open communication in complete vulnerability leads to dissolving every trauma response into love. Such resolutions collapse distance and unite in love. The romantic partner is the greatest teacher. I don't see her; I see my past trauma reflected back at my beautiful face. I don't blame her, but instead sit, resolve my pain, and communicate in complete truth, openness, receptivity, and vulnerability. Such resolutions of genuine love can only be met with love. Miracles and wonders of love will permeate the relationship.

Relationships are not meant for joy solely; how could they in my current state? Pain naturally arises as past layers of trauma appear, and that trauma causes distance and coldness between me and my partner until the trauma is resolved with responsibility in humbleness alone. Then, distance is collapsed as both partners share their conclusions in love.

Picture a sinus wave that grows more and more towards the center. Here is my ugly drawing:

After each trauma response, distance arises between the partners. The partners look into the mirror and resolve their traumatic responses with complete responsibility. Then, in complete vulnerability and open communication, love collapses the distance, and growth in love happens. Such is the journey to union here on earth. Growth in love is but natural in partnerships where traumas are faced acutely and consciously. Soul growth is recognized as the main purpose of the partnership. Coldness and distance are but natural in partnerships where the spiritual growth component is ignored. 

Grow in love with your partner, or marry your trauma and live with it. Or hop from partnership to partnership only to get the same trauma reflected at your beautiful face. Your soul wants to free itself. The world is a mirror. Divine partnerships are the way home. Awaken genuine love in your heart by working on your trauma responses, and in time a like soul will enter your life by frequency, and you can both share the growth journey and collapse pain to unite in love. I truly hope this helps someone.