It’s a weighty choice at that. One of the most complex ones that factors for our personal world-view, privilege, education, priorities and even time. 

I’ve seen intensely polarising views on this. 

One view argues this is as a personal a choice as can be. And we don’t owe society, our country, our religion and our ‘tribe’ continuity. And given how our society is framed and the lack of safety nets, I do bias to this side. 

You don’t owe it to anyone to become a parent to ensure your religion can grow and/or remain viable or your country’s tax base can expand and sustain. 

In fact, saying it makes me wonder what an absurd reason that might be for having a child. But there are people who subscribe to this idea. And they have a strong intrinsic motivation to act on this. And I can’t argue against this belief. It is an incredibly strong motivator that has gotten humanity to this size, complexity and degree of development or comfort. 

On the other hand, continuity of our species is an ingrained biological tendency. We could talk about K-strategies and why sex drive exists or where it comes from. It is incredibly complex how all of it might tie into our more evolved reasoning such as societal viability or religion for having children. 

But it might boil down to this: When you have a child, there is a person who will be subject to all your privileges, education, world-view, baggage, emotions and beliefs. Some people weigh these things and decide it is not something they want to do. Others, see those same things as the reason to have many children. And even in my circle, there are those who naturally gravitate towards wanting to be a parent. And others who don’t want to. And these are smart, evolved people who have good reasons to make the choices they make. 

But the moment a child is born everything really does change for the parent. And when I see my daughter, I don’t think social viability, how my ‘tribe’ goes on, how she contributes to the tax base or how much it costs to raise her. I just feel an incredible drive to give her all the resources, comfort and environment to be the most happy and fulfilled person that she can hopefully be. And that gives me both joy and keeps me up at night. Much more of the former than the latter.