As an adult, whenever we do something, there are two audiences: your kids and other adults. Given that we have kids and just ignore other kids.

Your kids will extract lessons from you regardless of what you want them to or like. They have their own mechanism of adapting to the world. Every parent wants the best for their kids. They tell them to behave well, to work hard, to be nice. Kids will look at their parents actions and behaviors to figure out the real meanings of all those teaching.

The other adults will always judge you. Either appraisal or criticized, for the same action, half will appraise, the other half will criticize.

It is hard to do something that get positive result from both those audience groups. And many times, we unconsciously favor the second group: the other adults group, desperately need the approval from them with the expense of our kids.

For every action, there are trade-offs. Pick consciously. And hopefully it is a wise one.