I know I’m not alone in having used, ‘It’s just who I am’ as an excuse. Rather than embracing the need to change or improve or develop, we settle. We embrace a version of ourselves that is closed to getting better. This is not to suggest we don’t genuinely have traits that are unique to us. We do. Whether innate or acquired, there are ...

I finished How to Change a few weeks ago and it continues to resonate in my mind. I’m still processing and applying the insights and lessons I absorbed. In short, if you need to change an area of your life, this book is a wonderful starting place! It’s full of evidence-backed counsel on how to deal with everything from procrastination ...

I stumbled across a quote by Xandria Ooi, shared in a blog post by Rebecca Toh, that has stayed with me this last week or so. Here’s what she wrote: “In life we don’t have to strive to be hardworking. We just have to strive to care. Because it is only when we care about something that we are driven and motivated to put in the work need...

It’s good to be be back after a week away from blogging, social media, news, and my usual daily workouts! Last week was the first of what I’m calling a ’sabbath’ or rest week that I’m going to take every seven weeks. Give myself a chance to reset, refresh, replenish, and get reinvigorated. Which is exactly how I feel after this last we...

It’s coming up to a month since I announced I was leaving Facebook. It’s been far less of a big deal than I imagined. I’ve hardly thought about it at all. In fact, the only time I can recall thinking about it was my wife’s birthday. (I was interested in having a nosey at all the messages left for her by friends and family.) Other than ...

Have you ever had someone say ’thank-you’ after you’ve done a task and seem genuinely stunned or amazed by what you’ve done? In their eyes, you’ve done the impossible. So pulling if off appears almost miraculous. It wasn’t of course. You just took on the necessary – and often boring – job of doing the work. And when it comes to work, a...

Over the last couple of years, I’ve been trying to increase my share of the household responsibilities. Reading Fair Play by Eve Rodsky opened my eyes to the ways in which I wasn’t doing my fair share. I have now achieved the status of ‘perfect husband’ and my wife doesn’t have a single complaint about me. Okay, maybe not quite... And,...

I mentioned that I was reading Wintering a few weeks ago. And I did something I never normally do: recommended a book I hadn’t yet read. Thankfully, having now read the book, I am not going to need to withdraw said recommendation! May’s book is a beautiful and evocative rumination on winter. Using both literal and metaphorical reflecti...

Austin Kleon wrote a delightful response to Adam Grant’s essay on languishing that I wrote about previously. He suggests that languishing, for him at least, is the wrong word. ‘I’m not languishing, I’m dormant,’ he writes. Semantics? Maybe. The difference in meaning may be subtle, but I take his point: “It seems to me that the reason t...

I’ve been reading books by Brian McLaren for coming up to twenty years. He is someone whose faith journey is several steps ahead of mine and, as such, he’s been a mentor from afar to me. His latest book, Faith after Doubt, is my favourite of his books to date. It captures the journey I’ve been on for the last twenty years as well as pr...

My brother-in-law, Russell Thompson, posted some interesting reflections on why we read on his blog recently. The whole piece is worth your time, but his conclusion stands out: “So reading is about escaping reality and also facing it. It can be about dreams and reality, sadness and happiness, thinking and not thinking. It’s a landscape...

My wife, Rachel, turned forty today. She brings so much love, joy, and light into the world, and it only seems right to share a few words to celebrate her life. I’ll start by saying that one of my favourite things about Rachel is that, no matter what is going on – whether personally, professionally, or globally – she never loses hope. ...

I enjoyed Oliver Burkeman’s recent article in The Imperfectionist, his newsletter. He reflects on the one seemingly universal truth of productivity: That, no matter who we are, three to four hours is our limit when it comes to work that requires intense mental focus. But what are we to do with that information? Most of us – sadly – are...

I’m not a poetry person. I would love to be, but it hardly ever clicks for me. Every so often I’ll give another collection of poems a try, but no matter how hard I try, I still don’t get it. My friend Beth, a former English teacher, even made it her personal mission to help me love poetry. I think she’s given up! After watching – and e...

Yesterday’s post introduced the concept of languishing. It’s a mental state that sits somewhere between depression and flourishing. And, in the fallout from the last year, it’s a state many of us – myself included – have found ourselves in. I noticed it when, for example, I'd bump into another parent at the school gates, dropping my yo...

I wrote last week about the need to acknowledge and recover from the trauma inflicted on us all thanks to Covid. In a similar vein, Psychologist Adam Grant has an insightful article in the New York Times on what is being called ‘languishing’. Here’s how Grant describes it: “Languishing is a sense of stagnation and emptiness. It feels a...

“Wisdom is not knowing more, but knowing with more of you, knowing deeper.” I came across this quote from Cynthia Bourgeault in one of Fr. Richard Rohr’s Daily Meditations some weeks ago. I love this idea of knowing deeper. So much knowing today feels shallow; a mere endless collecting of more information. Many of us are getting smarte...

I’m a big Apple TV fan. The little black box sits under each TV in our household. Its centralised organising of all our family TV watching is pretty much perfect. Every major provider here in the UK, apart from Netflix, now integrates with the Apple TV app. And it makes for a great overall experience. Sure it’s pricey, but I don’t thin...

Behavioural Science has an absorbing interview with Morton Schapiro and Saul Morson about their forthcoming book Minds Wide Shut. The authors take on the subject of fundamentalism, helping us broaden our understanding of its reach. We tend to associate fundamentalism with religion and politics. But fundamentalist thinking stretches int...

I’ve written previously about friendship. And one of my spiritual mentors, Fr Richard Rohr, has further stretched my understanding and appreciation of what true friendship is. In a recent Daily Meditation of his, he wrote: “Most people also have colleagues with whom they work or associates with whom they spend regular time. But this st...

I wrote yesterday about our need for a recovery plan from the trauma of the last year. And then, later in the day, I came across this quote via James Clear, from the book Wintering by Katherine May: “We are in the habit of imagining our lives to be linear, a long march from birth to death in which we mass our powers, only to surrender ...

How many of us would acknowledge that we’re suffering from trauma as a result of this last year? And that we need a recovery plan to address what we’ve been through? If you’re anything like me, you’ll answer with something like, ‘It’s been tough, but I’m fine. It’s not trauma though. That’s something other people who have had it far wo...

I love writing. I love learning about writing. Playing with words and finding creative ways to craft sentences and paragraphs is a joy for me. Though I’ve had my fair share of compliments about my ‘way with words’ over the years, I never stop looking for ways to improve my writing. The most significant book I’ve read that’s helped me w...

Introvert? Not looking forward to the return to ‘normal’? You are not alone! This, from an article in the Washington Post, captures the feelings of many: “And now we’re returning to the pre-pandemic world, or as close as we can get. Like everyone else, introverts are excited about seeing family and close friends in person, dining in re...

Years ago I heard a preacher say, ‘Love unexpressed is a pretty useless thing’. It stayed with me. Making the point that it’s not enough to feel love towards others; we have to show people and tell them. Don’t assume they know. Or that saying it in the past is enough. We need to continually express love to the people we love. I was rem...

It’s official: I’m leaving Facebook. I’ve toyed with the idea for several years. Dramatically reduced my usage in that time. Stopped following many of the people I’m friends with. (Sorry, not sorry!) It didn’t feel like a good use of my time. The best bits for me (and the parts I’ll miss) are interactions with international friends, or...

Let me be honest: I was hesitant about picking up this book. Was it going to be another actor attempting to – badly – try their hand at something else. Using their fame to sell a few copies of something bang average. And would I be able to see past Ethan Hawke and get lost in the story? Even though this isn’t Hawke’s first novel, I was...

National Geographic recently published an article on the effect of the pandemic on our procrastinating. If your procrastinating has been getting worse over the last year, you are not alone. And you have something other than yourself you can now blame! Before delving into why, let’s remind ourselves what procrastination is. From the art...

I tend to read two types of books. Either it’s a novel, or it’s a book on a subject I want to learn more about. It’s fair to say, I read a lot of both types. Typically around forty, evenly split, on any given year. But when it comes to the books I’m learning from, I’ve always had a problem: I don’t retain as much as I’d like to. I fini...

Until two weeks ago I’d never heard of Mick Herron. Nor his series of spy novels. It was Om Malik who drew my attention to him, writing about the newest book in the series. My curiosity was piqued and I ordered a copy of the first book. I’m glad I did. I’ve never been a big reader of spy fiction. No real reason. Just haven’t. I read – ...