October 19, 2023
What success will never teach us
I wonder how good any of us are at accurately judging just how much we don’t know. I mean, who of us likes to admit the limits to our knowledge or understanding? And yet, what if the better we are at being aware about what we don’t know, the better shot we’ll have at making a lasting success of our lives and organisations? No matter wh...
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October 5, 2023
Embracing boredom
I came across a wonderful and provocative Bertrand Russell quote about the importance of boredom recently. Sarah Wilson highlighted it in her book ‘This One Wild and Precious Life’. “A generation that cannot endure boredom will be a generation…in whom every vital impulse slowly withers, as though they were cut flowers in a vase.” I’m s...
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September 24, 2023
Readable writing
I’m reading ‘Writing for Busy People’ by Jessica Lasky-Fink and Todd Rogers at the moment. I recommend it if your life involves any amount of writing—whether texts, emails, documents, or even books. The paragraph below resonated in particular. “When you are balancing the trade-offs between readability and using longer, less common but ...
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September 5, 2023
Unable to meet the emotional needs of my poorly wife
Living with someone who is long-term sick is hard. It’s not as hard as it is for the one struggling with illness, but it’s hard none-the-less. Over the last twelve years, my wife, Rachel, has struggled with various health conditions that have left her home-bound, unable to work for significant stints of time. Ranging from Graves’ disea...
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September 2, 2023
Heard, Seen, Read #9
Welcome to the weekend 😊 Here’s issue #9 of the things I’ve been listening to, watching, and reading lately. As always, do drop me a note with any of your recommendations. 📚 Big Swiss by Jen Beagin I don’t think I’ve ever read a novel quite like this! It an odd, unlikely premise, but somehow it works and, like all good novels, sheds li...
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August 30, 2023
Never challenge someone from a place of ignorance
Hello 👋 It’s been a while. I went on holiday at the end of July and ended taking an extended summer break from my blog. It’s good to be back! How’s your summer been? (For those of you who are in parts of the world where it’s winter, feel free to share too!) You may also notice I’m back posting from HEY World rather than Substack. I rea...
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August 8, 2023
Love is a practice
Where does your mind go when your hear the word ‘love’? Is it to romance? To feelings? Or perhaps to passion? Maybe words like commitment, trust, attraction, or intimacy come to mind. There’s no right or wrong answer. Any conversation about what love is should only ever continue in the spirit of, ‘Yes, and…’. And in that spirit, I want...
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August 8, 2023
Reason is not enough
I came across this wonderful, provocative quote a week or so ago by Dostoevsky, in his book, Notes from Underground: “Reason is an excellent thing, there's no disputing that, but reason is nothing but reason and satisfies only the rational side of man's nature, while will is a manifestation of the whole life, that is, of the whole huma...
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August 8, 2023
The second step is easier
One of my intentions for 2023 has been to exercise more. It took until April for me to make a start, but I got there. Warmer, lighter mornings made all the difference for me! Having made a start, I quickly got into a rhythm of doing HIIT workouts several mornings a week. Then, a week away on holiday in May, followed by various family i...
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Early this year, I read a powerful article by Rebekah Toh on the courage to stop, and stop properly. Here’s what she wrote: “…it’s good to stop. Not just taking in less, but taking in none. Even one day of stopping works wonders for the soul. Three days are better. A week even better. …When we stop consuming so much new information and...
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August 8, 2023
The most irrelevant commandment
If I was to ask you, ‘Which is the most irrelevant of the Ten Commandments?’, which would you pick? I suspect that the second commandment might win any poll. Here’s what it says: ‘You shall not make for yourself an idol, whether in the form of anything that is in heaven above, or that is on the earth beneath, or that is in the water un...
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Is it possible to change? Is transformation attainable? It’s tempting to want to be definitive in our answer. We are quick to default to dualistic, black or white thinking. We take sides; we’re either in the Yes or the No camp. But, like many things in life, the essence is found in the grey; in between the Yes or the No. There are plen...
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August 8, 2023
The desire line
We all ‘want it all’, right? At the very least, very few of us don’t want more. A bigger house. A better job. A fancier car. The latest smartphone. Nicer clothes. More glamorous holidays. That list may not be your more, but there’ll be something. And we convince ourselves that life will be better once we get that thing. We do this agai...
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August 8, 2023
Validate me
Who am I? It’s a question asked since the dawn of time. It’s a question every generation, every community, and every one of us wrestles with, both consciously and sub-consciously. Am I who my family says I am? Or my friends? Is it my community? Or maybe my boss or my colleagues? It’s hard to pretend that each of these people don’t have...
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May 15, 2023
The gift of undivided attention
Being fully present to the people we’re with and the moment we’re in Most of us know by now that there’s no such thing as multi-tasking. We’re simply fast-switching between tasks, often in detrimental ways to our well-being and productivity. I sit at my desk, with two screens, multiple apps open, constantly switching from one to anothe...
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February 9, 2023
Balancing MY work with OUR work
I’ve been thinking about productivity a lot lately. Both worries about my lack of it, and my dislike of the term. Let’s start with the latter. ‘Productivity’ feels like such a cold, heartless, transactional word. As if I’m a cog in a wheel, existing solely to be efficient and generate output (for somebody else). There’s a ruthlessness ...
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January 14, 2023
New year, same old me
I’ve long passed on setting New Year’s resolutions. Though a fresh start and a line in the sand can give some momentum to making changes, it’s never enough. One year passing into the next, by itself, isn’t sufficient. Sure, there can be benefit in grabbing the psychological benefit of a clean slate and a kick start, but much more needs...
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December 17, 2022
When there’s too much to do and not enough time
There is always more work I could be doing. I’m yet to come close to clearing my to do list. And there are some things I really should have done by now, but I haven’t. Why? Because work isn’t everything. Don’t misunderstand me, I enjoy my work. Well, mostly! But life is more than work. And long, unsustainable working hours is something...
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December 4, 2022
Are you energising or draining the people around you?
What is your impact on others? Are the people you interact with better off from their being around you, or worse? Do you elevate the people you interact with, or bring them down? When you’re with others do they end up being more-than they would or could have been, or less-than? Are those around you energised or drained by your presenc...
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November 3, 2022
Changing my mind more
“Progress is impossible without change; and those who cannot change their minds cannot change anything. – George Bernard Shaw” I came across this quote in the daily The World in Brief email I get from The Economist. I appreciated the reminder. Politicians have given changing your mind a bad reputation. The moment a political opponent c...
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October 29, 2022
Figuring it out, or getting found out?
Adam Grant, in a recent newsletter wrote this: “Impostor syndrome: “I don’t know what I’m doing. It’s only a matter of time until everyone finds out." Growth mindset: “I don’t know what I’m doing yet. It’s only a matter of time until I figure it out.” The highest form of self-confidence is believing in your ability to learn.” As someon...
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October 16, 2022
Turning towards
I listened to an episode of Brené Brown’s ‘Unlocking Us’ podcast last week where her guests were Drs. John and Julie Gottman. They have studied relationships for years, and their insights were fascinating. Though they were primarily talking in the context of couples, one thing they shared made so much sense to me across multiple contex...
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September 23, 2022
An obligation to be hopeful
I was watching an episode of ‘Gutsy’ on Apple TV+ last week and something Hilary Clinton said has stayed with me. She said, ‘we have an obligation to be hopeful’. The context was a conversation between women refusing to hate despite being the victims of all manner of violent and abusive personal attacks. But apt as the line about hope ...
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August 31, 2022
All change
Hello! It’s been a while. After enjoying a two week holiday in Switzerland in late July / early August, I’ve been adapting to a new role at work that I officially start tomorrow. Hence I’ve been quiet. And, in truth, I find it healthy to step away from writing sometimes. I do intend to start writing more again in the coming weeks, but ...
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July 13, 2022
Without innovation tradition dies
I can’t recall where I read it, but the words, ‘without innovation tradition dies,’ immediately made sense to me. It sounds contradictory. Aren’t the ideas of innovation and tradition incompatible? Not necessarily. No tradition should ever carry on uncritically. ‘We always do this because it’s always what’s been done,’ is never a good ...
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July 7, 2022
Don't lose sight of the present
This post references sport but if sport isn’t your thing, don’t worry, the point is not about sport. Stay with me! Sport is simply the backdrop for this idea. Eddie Jones is the head coach of England rugby side. For the last couple of years the side has struggled with poor form and lots of defeats. He is still head coach though and his...
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July 6, 2022
Telling people you appreciate them
Reflecting on my own life, too much gratitude and appreciation goes unspoken. I think it. But I don’t say it. And unexpressed gratitude and appreciation is a pretty useless thing. Why do I hold back? Pride, perhaps. Not wanting to appear vulnerable. But it’s also just habit. Or lack of it. The more I do something, the more I start to d...
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July 1, 2022
Gratitude in the small moments, not just the big
It’s easy to be grateful for the big moments in life. A new job. A fantastic holiday. A loved-one’s birthday. That’s not to say gratitude is a given though. It’s still very much a choice. But gratitude truly finds its wings when it reaches beyond the exceptional and extends to the mundane. There’s a reason millions of religious people ...
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June 22, 2022
Passion is… bad?
I love it when something I believe gets throughly challenged by something I read. Today’s daily meditation from the Centre for Action and Contemplation does exactly that. Cynthia Bourgeault, the author of the post, writes about the difference between our modern understanding of emotions and the teachings of the Desert Fathers and Mothe...
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June 21, 2022
To hope is to jump
I’ve been watching a few episodes of season two of ‘Home’ on AppleTV+ this week. It’s a fascinating looking at incredible homes from around the world. That’s not what I want to write about though. It simply happened that one of the home owners, a Swedish lady, said during an interview that the Swedish word for hope also means to jump. ...
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